Thief Impaled Up His Asshole by Steel Fence Spike

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Thief Impaled Up His Asshole by Steel Fence Spike

Thief tried to break into the East London Museum in South Africa but got spooked by the alarm he triggered and made an attempt to get the hell out of there as quickly as possible to avoid having to share a jail cell with a tattooed guy named Bubba. A tree became his passage over the fence with ominously looking steel spikes on top, but being in a hurry the thief slipped and fell on the fence, impaling himself right up his asshole with one of the 30 cm long spikes.

He was noticed by a man who overheard his moans and alarmed the police. Firefighters had to be called in to cut the spike from the fence and the thief was transported into the hospital with a chunk of steel still up his bum hole. With ruptured rectum and intestines, the thief surely felt like he would have been better off spending that night with Bubba.

Props to Best Gore member Robert Oppenheimer for the pics:

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136 thoughts on “Thief Impaled Up His Asshole by Steel Fence Spike”

  1. Bwahahahaha!

    That is hilarious. No doubt the contractors that put up the fence will be sued for ‘dat Racismz’ for discriminating against the hardworking blackman… Ain’t his fault he wanted the dirty cash.

      • Oh, I say just leave bastard on there as a warning. London has a tradition of skewing their enemies on pikes, and I’m glad the Brits are getting back to their Roots >=)

        • Shame Hawk…

          I wanted to bring that in myself… Seems they have pipped me to the post on this one.

          I would have the enemies of the people hung, drawn and quartered… Possibly the greatest method of capital punishment ever conceived of… A BRITISH invention as well!

          It was usually reserved for the most traitorous of cunts.

          Today’s political class qualify for the treatment.

          And I shall have the Holohoax memorials in our museums replaced with memorials commemorating the High treason our leaders inflicted upon us in the post-1918 period.

          • Hooray! and prehaps you Britannians could move the capital some where else like further up north away from the Muslim shithole of Londanistan.

          • It was proposed by the Socialist MP Hilary Benn amongst others to move the capital of the country to Liverpool or York.

            A sound idea… The city of choice will be a part of some ‘British Capital District’ like the Americans, Canadians and Aussies have. Whilst the capital of England will still be London.

            I am not a big fan though. The simple fact is. No other British city has the history or the infrastructure to maintain such a large political establishment.

            Not forgetting, that our cities were never planned to manage powerful nations like you New Worlders have. They were usually set up as ad-hoc settlements by the Romans to take advantage of trade routes leading back to Rome… They then kind of grown amorphously since.

    • Hi Trooper72, this was in East London, it was never going to be anything other than a black man, I doubt there is a white face left there.

      The white man will be the new black man soon, we are discriminated against on a daily basis in England, Muslims have more rights than the Christians, cheap foreign labour is chosen over the indigenous population and racist attacks against whites is not a crime only when it is the opposite.

      Also have you ever tried getting a job with one of the councils, unless you are black, gay/transgender or a women you have not got a chance, I used to work for one but was let go because I was not the right image that they wished to portray.

      • I worked for the council in London and I swear I thought I was in Pakistan or India half the time, It was horrendous and I actually had no white person sitting in the same office floor, I mean seriously London has become a joke.

      • @Empty soul -here in the US + the Washington DC area (and about 10 years ago), I used to hear that people would be hired for jobs or positions in local government/schools if they “Looked Like America”. This Always meant non-whites or “people of color”. Have you heard a similar propagandist slogan in the UK?

        • Hi antivirus, the propagandist slogan used in the UK is either “The modern diverse workplace” or the “representative of our multicultural society” or good old fashioned “positive discrimination”

          What all these statements mean is that, if you are straight, white and male we will not recruit you, so don’t bother even applying.

          This kind of thing is wide spread in the UK, particularly in the public sector.

          • It’s true in England (and probably Scotland, Wales & Northern Ireland too) that they need a percentage of workers to be of ‘minority background’ to meet PC quota’s. That means if there is 1 job left and they haven’t met their quota, it doesn’t matter how good the majority of the applicants for that last vacancy are, it’s gonna go to a ‘minority’.

    • Hey fellas…

      Dre, too fucking right mate. I would have grabbed hold of his love handles and pulled down hard. Teach the thieving bastard a lesson he won’t forget in a hurry.

      Empty Soul, it is the story of a people. Forget getting a job with any of the ‘promoters of diversity’. English cities are gone. Perhaps with the exceptions of Liverpool and the small Cathedral cities…

      It is going to get a whole lot worst before it gets any better, the blood of our Countrymen will taint the Thames red before we have shaken the shackles of servitude from our fellow Celts and Saxons.

      Britain will be the first to revolt against our masters… We are the night watchmen who always see the threat before our European brothers.

      We shall not die. We shall succeed. And the downfall of the dictators is assured.

      • @trooper
        Cough *hypocrite* cough. Don’t it suck when some pricks come into your land and try to destroy your culture and people cough *british* cough. So you say when they try to take over your land you will fight back cough *IRA* cough. You say they come to your land and treat your people like second class people, Well isn’t that what you Brits did to the IRISH.

        • oh snaps, we got us a classic brawl.
          is anyone going to talk about the war between the free papua movement and indonesia? Ever since the dutch left they have been at it non-stop.
          Those fuccking indo’s screwed up the kratom imports. don’t get me started on Malaysia

        • Bloody hell Spanky… You really are going for the jugular on this one.

          Well let me tell you something about your precious Ireland.

          It is a BRITISH invention. Ireland has never been a united, independent state. Before our King Henry VIII had conquered it and united it under the English flag. Ireland was simply a group of constantly warring fiefdoms and small kingdoms.

          And those invaders that you describe… The Ulster Scots, have been in Ulster (and the rest of Ireland) for 500 years. They have as much a right to be there as the ‘native’ Irish (not that there are any left of course).

          What nobody has the bollocks to tell the Irish is that they would be fuck all without us… They would have the same cultural impact on the globe as Estonia or Bulgaria if they hadn’t adopted the English language.

          I don’t doubt that the English have been colossal wankers in the past. I myself as a Manxman know all too well of foreigners invading your homeland and removing jobs and increasing property prices.

          It is a purely natural thing anyway. For smaller nations to gravitate towards the stronger power. And Ireland is as guilty as sending people over to Britain as Britain is too Ireland.

          And considering it is the democratic will of BOTH CATHOLICS AND PROTESTANTS that Northern Ireland remain a part of the UK… No amount of whinging South of the border is going to change it.

          My own personal opinion on the matter is for the UK to become a Republic. That is my Catholic side coming out.

          But the side which tells me that I must be loyal to my fellow Celts… Is that Northern Ireland would be better off in a strong union of Celtic brothers.

          And or to mention the sheer amount of blood that has been spilled to defend the Northerners rights to self-determination.

          The differences with the alien kultur invading Mother Europe today (it is affecting both our Nation’s Spanky)… Is that we were never informed or given the choice through Ballot or Bullet as to our Master’s designs on our future.

          All great people’s should fight for their nation… But the Northern Irish have fought… They choose to be British.

          Maybe their will come a time when the Ballot fails and we must resort to the Bullet… Until then, we must unite and face down the common enemy Spanky.

          • Spanky needs spanking! hehe..Seen as this debates seems to never end I Vote Trooper to open his own facebook page, I will be your no 1 fan <3

          • Dat Raycist steel Fence should be locked up in Jail… Right next to Emma West.

            On a more serious note. FREE EMMA WEST! Politcal Prisoner of the PC British ZOGovernment!

          • Just let it be known, I hold no ill feeling towards the Irish or English. I think Anglophobia/ Hibernophobia is incredibly immature and divisive.

            We need to be united against the common enemy.

            And here is my source as to when I said that it is both the democratic will that both Northern Irish Catholics and Protestants want to stay as part of the UK:

            http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/local-national/northern-ireland/is-catholic-support-for-a-united-ireland-on-the-wane-16013433.html

            Cheers GW… I will drop you my email eventually.

          • Simply put I can’t help but feel everything you just said is bs but I’d rather not argue when both our views are from diffrent angles.
            This fight won’t end till Eire is whole again which is unlickly ever gonna happen.

          • Accouriding to wiki “A 2006 Sunday Business Post survey reported that almost 80% of voters in the Republic favour a united Ireland: 22% believe that “achieving a united Ireland should be the first priority of the government” while 55% say they “would like to see a united Ireland, but not as the first priority of government.” Of the remainder 10% said no efforts should be made to bring about a united Ireland and 13% had no opinion”

          • Spanky.

            I have plenty of mates who are on both sides of the Northern Irish political divide. We don’t let politics get in the way of our friendship.

            It is a sad situation. I do sympathise with and understand a United Ireland.

            I would go so far as to say that there would be a Republican, United Ireland already had the IRA not started murdering innocents.

            We Brits have lost too much to let Northern Ireland descend into chaos… The divisions are a stark reality of those who are Ulster Scots.

          • Yes troop it is a touchy topic for me being from one of the few remaining places still speaking our native language.I try to not talk about it or politics in genaral but if you get a few drinks in me and say somthing that sparks that part of my mind you might as well leave cause you won’t shut me up ;) .

    • Shoddy, cheap workmanship on fences these days. I woulda been pretty pissed to see that my fence bent like that. Pft.

      But uh yeah, damn. That’s up there with Mr. Hands. Heeheeheeeeee.

  5. He should have let himself get caught. Burglary is not considered a crime in the UK, get caught doing 5mph over the speed limit and that is a crime and our police will punish you but burgle a house and they will not even bother to turn up, unless of cause it was a rich persons house.

    As far as taking it up the ass, we English are very much used to it, with our greedy self-serving politicians and our business leaders love for cheap foreign labour we are forced to take it in the ass everyday.

  17. There once was a thief named Jesse
    Who went to steal some art, but it got messy
    He went to hop the fence
    Slipped and fell for just a few pence
    Now a man named Bubba is his best friend

  22. @Trooper72.
    I too, long for the day when the indigenous population of these islands take back the country that is rightly theirs. Frustration has now turned to anger at the way austerity, corporate greed and multiculturalism is inflicted on us by the EU and our own successive governments.
    If this cannot be acheived at the ballot box, then some other means will be found.
    But no national uprising, however popular, can ever be successful unless it is backed by that nations armed forces.
    Can you see this happening in the U.K.?

    • Certainly d.i.y…

      The Armed Forces is choc-a-block with idealistic, socially aware lads and ladies like ourselves.

      And they are often led by decent officers as well.

      Considering the rampant mutilation and abuse that our dear Leaders have inflicted upon our Armed Forces… And considering the stupid fucking wars they get them to fight as well…

      The Military will be the first major organisation to support our ‘People’s Rebellion’.

      We were the first nation in the West to have a major Civil war… We shall be the first to have two Civil wars.

      We were quite close as short a time ago in the seventies… The economic and social events in the Country had forced the late Earl Mountbatten to plot with Military and Intelligence leaders to overthrow the Wilson Government.

      If only the Royal Family had half his bollocks in the lot of them.

      • @Trooper72.
        Thanks for your reply and comment. I agree that the millitary is full of personnel who are appalled at what is happening to their country, and would take the side of the British people if asked to do so.
        I also think this will happen a lot sooner than many people think.
        With even more austerity measures to come and no real slowdown on immigration figures, I can see major upheaval taking place within the next decade.

  25. That must be so awkward… Anyway I always thought that those spikes on fences are useless oh well, I guess I learned something today.

    But damn he bent the metal with his anus, you go girl!

    • Yessir!

      Anything we can do to assist Tulio’s Banana Republic?

      I am a reasonable guy when it comes to agreeing with me on issues that you will agree with me on.

      A new era in Anglo-Argentine relations dawns.

  28. Aw! That’s painful and embarrassing for him to be caught like that. On a positive side of it, he can now take double penetration from 2 Bubbas no sweat at all.

    • Having thought about it makes this fact hard to swallow for him. Butt fuck it, he’ll get used to them anyways. He’s now the Most Venerable Queer of Fromundas the prison rectum raiders will toy with

  45. How embarrassing for this fine upstanding citizen to have his period in public and NOT have a maxi pad! Folks: that is just poor planning. Don’t let this happen to you!

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