The Caption This Photo Contest #19

Naughty Man's Christmas Tree Decoration

Gore is poetry, let’s hear it. Here’s my lame attempt:

Santa Missed the Chimney
Hurting Woman’s Kidney
Threw Her on a Tree
Rudolph Won’t Agree
She Sucked Cock for Jitney

Best Caption:

Just wait for my dismount – skindee

Runners-up:

Abandoned in the jungle as a child, Jane was raised by wild Sloths until her rescue… – nellboy

Finally, the Greenpeace activist is dead. Let’s chop this tree down boys. – John Merrick

This is my family tree
I’ll start with my aunt jill – RC

Soft limbs yearn for light,
Pale magnet rapt gaze summons.
Songbird finds a home. – Joe112358

Hey Pete, you remember when you asked me what it’d be like skydiving naked? – VEXXED

Author: Vincit Omnia Veritas

Best Gore may be for SALE. Hit me up if you are interested in exploring the purchase further and have adequate budget.

103 thoughts on “The Caption This Photo Contest #19”

  1. I am not going to participate in any caption this photo contest from now on because the winners ususlly are some simple not clever poems, which I find them extremely boring and silly. I don’t want to offend anyone, I’m just suggesting a little bit more creativity in your comments and mr. BestGore’s selections for “best caption”

    1. I feel ya Corvis. Don’t care much for limericks. Even a chimp can rap. There is no accounting for taste. It is, however, an open forum littered with free speech (thank God) and such is our every communication.

      1. You are so right mr. 8X4. That’s why I am expressing my personal opinion. That’s also why I am expressing my personal decision not to post to any caption contest furthermore! Cheers! I’ll be looking forward seeing some creative posts! 🙂

  2. ok not a caption but, i so want to know the story to this, i’m thinking her sitting up in the tree like that nude it was either a random sewer geyser or a rapist watched discovery channel and copied a puma

  3. Uh…, Hello…, uh…, Superman?
    Yeah, it’s uh…, It’s Officer Corvus down here in Metropolis Park.
    I uh…, I think your little sister mighta been doin a bit of partyin and drinkin last night… Again.

  4. Im gonna go out on a “limb” here and guess that
    Tal Rashah’s first language is not english and i dont have a problem with that, but, if his/her shitty non-rhyming poem wins or gets an honourable mention, the only comments i will be making from now on will be to slam the people who think that just because they can make sentences with rhyming words, they are obviously funny comments. Comments that Joe112358, Usagi, Corvus, 8×4, many others and even sometimes myself make that are witty and funny get overlooked for lame, thoughtless and boring poems that any asshole can write every time. Oh and good one mastermind420, I was gonna say
    “Georgina of the jungle” but you posted the same idea joke first.

  5. Thank you Big Johnson; I agree with you guys, however I am not going to picket this picture because I think it is fucking brilliant and there are good comments this picture…

    “Serial killer John? Seriously? A body in a tree is a sure sign of a leopard you dipshit.”

  6. *To Tune Of Up On The Rooftop*
    Up in the treetop
    Holy shit
    Do you see the size of that Tranny’s dick?
    Bigger than my left arm
    Bigger than my leg
    Whoever takes that in the ass is surely dead.

  7. Oh im not picketting anything Usagi, in fact im probably gonna post more than ever to show that a witty/funny comment is better than a rambling pointless poem with no real relevance to the picture. Kariion, thats funny shit. Thats a great, intelligent comment without just using words that end with the same letters, keep it up.

  8. Thanks Johnson. I pop in here everyday hoping for something new, and when I’m feeling creative, I’ll post in here. Not to win the best caption or anything like that, but just put a smile on a person or two’s face. :).

  9. Ive always liked ur comments Joe and thats why i mentioned your name in my previous comments but in those last 2 contests that u won, you had many more comments that i would put above any of the poems etc. that took the runners up/honourable mentions, that i, as well as it seems many other people have grown tired of. I look forward to more of your comments and hope u enjoy some of mine as well. And Kariion, u put a smile on my face.

    1. I appreciate the opportunity to read all the comments, even the ones I don’t find particularly funny.
      Like Big Johnson’s. (hehe just kidding B.)
      We all have our own sense of humor, but even I never know which ones are gonna make me smile till I’m done reading them.
      So please folks, don’t be shy and keep the comments coming, this site is much much more interesting as a result.
      I salute ALL who make the effort.

  10. Bottom line, Mark, I love the site and will continue to come on every day and love to be able to post my comments freely. I am just expressing my thoughts and what i believe and if people dont agree with me then thats their right as well. I am always open to critisism and discussion.

  11. I knew it was only a question of time before whining begins. Human nature is undeniable – everybody think their opinion is the only one that?s right. When the post about the worst killers in history was posted, I knew right away the bitchfest will ensue because when it comes to opinions, everybody believes theirs is the only one that?s correct.

    I for one think haiku and other poems are brilliant but most of all, a Best Gore signature commentary. Though I must admit that Gorphan was the master of it and since he?s disappeared it just hasn?t had the same spark. Still, gore and poetry is unique to Best Gore and in my mind, the most brilliant thing that?s happened on here.

    Obviously, since this is a subjective opinion, everybody who thinks otherwise will start whining and bitching and post childish crap like ?I won?t post on here anymore? blah blah. What are you fucking 3 year old to pout like that? Get to kiddy sites if that?s the case. This should be a site for mature adults, not sulky kids. Little girls need to go back to playing with dolls, for the rest of you – grow up or shut up.

    1. First of all, its not whining. If YOU have the right to say that you love poems on a gore site, then why dont I have the same right to say that I dont? I thought we were talking about free speech and subjective opinions? I Guess not since as you stated, your opinion that poetry is beautiful and “best of all, a best gore signature commentary,” is the obvious and only correct opinion that no one can disagree with. See what im getting at? As for being mature, sick fucks like us that make petty jokes about the most horrific things in humanity, albeit damn funny, are definitely not mature adults. I never said that I will not post anymore on this site but as for going to kiddy sites, DONE! But I posted a video of a guy getting beheaded on poetry.com, and i got to tell you, it didnt really get received well, in fact, im no longer allowed on that site. Funny cause I just assumed that posting gore on a poetry site would be accepted no diiferently than posting poetry on a gore site. Go figure. Poetry fans have a problem with free speech and objective opinions as well.

      1. Even I will admit, I enjoyed most of Gorphans “Haikus,” but it was the onslaught of everyone else that decided to put together shitty, unfunny, unwitty, haikus, limericks, or whatever different kind of poems that were fucking terrible, that I finally decided submit MY opinion. A few of them might be good, most of them are fucking awful and dont make sense

      2. I think the that guy was referring to me. I was in fact whining and saying I won’t post again. Seems there are many of us who don’t like false poems (those single-verse statements with no structure at all might be funny to some but they are definitely not poems)

        1. Corvus, kiddo – you’re just proven that everything I said was correct. I’m the one who appreciated all comments – whether poems or otherwise, whereas you’re the one who felt the need to whine. You’re just a little whiny kid is all.

          You are also the one who forced your opinion upon everyone, regardless of what they liked, acting as though your crap smelled like roses. Whiny kiddos with holier than thou attitude need to shut up, which is exactly what I said. Unlike you, I never said that only the type of comments I approve of are right. I?m appreciative of all comments, except from the whinery of kids. If you have nothing of value to add, just shut your mouth!

          1. The good thing is that none of the comments are deleted, so anyone can read our whole “conversation” if they wish. I am not here for verbal fights so I’d prefer to stop arguing with you, as it seems pointless.
            Cheers!

  12. Wow, forget the contest! I wish I knew how the hell she managed to die up there or who put her up there? Genius! Momma always said the best way to hide a body is somewhere obvious where nobody would think you’d hide it but damn…this is…wow…

  13. Thanks for the input, guys. You’ll just have to put up with me for the time being and I’ll try to implement some form of voting system so best captions get chosen by popular vote. I’ll see what I can do but it won’t be available immediately.

    Mark

    1. Mark, like I said in post 35, you do and unbeleiveable job and have the best gore site in the world. And it is your site so do whatever you want with it. Make it a voting system, pick the winners yourself, i really dont care, i’ll still be back the next day. I just like the fact that I can say what I want freely. If you like the poetry and dont like the fact that I say that I dont, you could have kicked me off this site a long time ago and you didnt. That tells me you are for freedom of expression, a term that is getting forgotten in this world today. But if people can post and say how funny they think poems are, why cant I post and say the opposite?

    2. A voting system would really be great! I personally don’t ask for changes. The site is already awesome. I was just expressing my opinions. Great things can come out of discussion unless some people end their statements with a phrase meaning more or less “follow my opinions or shut up”. I am referring to angie

      1. I’m not entirely sure I want a voting system enacted here.
        Do I really want to know how many people DIDN’T find my jokes funny?
        I kind of enjoy my current ongoing delusion that EVERYONE who reads my captions laughs their guts out every time.
        Undeniable numerical confirmation of my own mere half-wittedness may be somewhat deflating.

    1. My first Haiku!
      Hopefully I didn’t offend the ear any true Haiku poets out there.
      Didn’t turn out very funny I guess…
      I do wish we could edit our posts after the fact.
      I think I might change a few words in there if I could.
      Oh well, maybe next time.

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