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Lord Wankdust

My old Uncle Alec said he greased the tracks of his tank with Nazi Blood, Nazi shit and Nazi guts all the way from Holland to Berlin. The Allied Forces (the Scottish ones anyway) were allowed to collect any Nazi’s watches and wallets – all the way to Berlin. That bought a lot of beer back in Scotland after the War. I mean for decades.
I kinda miss old Uncle Alec and his funny stories about WW2.

My Uncle Jimmy got fucking Blitz Kreiged all the way from the Maginot Line back through Belgium and Northern France. Jimmy had to be evacuated from his wee European Holiday with the British Expeditionary Force in May/ June 1940. Him and his regiment left from Brest (with some excellent wine) in North-West France (Nord Ouest de la France) because he didn’t manage to get away earlier at Dunkirk as the Nazis were busy bombing the beaches. Uncle Jimmy never forgave Hitler for that Blitz Kreig which meant Jimmy having to work in the Scottish Coalmines for the next few years, deep underground, while Churchill and the Yanks got a plan to have another European Holiday. When Jimmy next got a crack at The Hun, it was via North Africa, Italy (Monte Cassino, Venice) then up into Germany via Yugoslavia, Hungary and Czechoslovakia. The really nasty little Nazi shitholes. That was watches and wallets all the way too.
My Uncle Jimmy, like many ex-servicemen, was still selling German watches in Ayrshire pubs in the early 1970s. Those particular Nazis greased the tills during many nights in the bars of Central Scotland.

Cheers Fritz!