What does the size and shape of your cock- head say about you??

Best Gore Forums Fapping Corner Naked Girls What does the size and shape of your cock- head say about you??

This topic contains 65 replies, has 11 voices, and was last updated by  Hoping for Nemesis 3 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #113460

    Hoping for Nemesis
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    Ok.i have not put a topic up for a long time and given it is Friday afternoon where i am currently and am horny here we go!

    Look at your man’s erect cock! If he has a relatively large glans (cock-head) with deeply edged sulcus (ie cockhead edge with notch behind it joining into rest of shaft) you can draw some broad conclusions on the faithfullness of his great great grandmothers all the way back to Eve.!

    If his cockhead is large and the sulcus(notch behind the cockhead is large) it means that his maternal ancestors were relatively unfaithful to his paternal line!

    Why? Because as our docs and nurses on this site will tell you a syringe works by creating a vacuum to suck out liquids.

    So your man has a large cockhead because his male ancestors survived because they were able to suck out and remove other men’s semen when fucking their women! If these male ancestors had relatively small cock -heads then the other men’s semen who had jizzed in there before them would have won out and your man’s male line would have died out well before your man could even be born!

    How do we know this? We know it by studies of our cousins ;gorillas and chimps. Chimps are our closest cousins and have more sex and extramarital sex than all of us. Gorilla males have much smaller cocks and cock- heads in proportion to us and chimps because gorilla females are much more faithful than chimp females. In fact, chimp males have much bigger cocks and cockheads in proportion to their size than humans as they are also much more precocious than us!

    So i dont want any death threats or curses from any men or offended women! We are talking about general behaviour of females in your man’s line over millions of years not your man’s mother or grandmother! So tell him to cool it!

    Also i do not want any Creationists to abuse me. After all ,Eve Is the biggest cheater anyway! Go ask the Bible!

    So guys next time you watch porn and you see a fellow with a heroically -sized glans ,you can smike secretly to yourself with satisfied one-upmanship;at least your grandsmas were faithful to your grandpappies ! Haha, heroic porn-actor!😉

    @roadpavement
    @1purple8
    @thedre
    @doc-undy
    @nursekate
    @loosythepoosy
    Last three; docs and nurses / ex nurses i know on these sites.

  • #113463

    Hoping for Nemesis
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    And @countrygal1958 . Ijust saw she had same name here on bestgore.

  • #113503

    Dream me better
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    Where in the jaysus did we get ya from Nem!?

    I’ll be back later when I’m not so busy to comment in your funny and educational forum.

    I did hear once that when a man blows off in a woman that the jizz ends up in her brain.

    • #113504

      illegalsmile55
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      @1purple8

      I’ve been waiting patiently for someone to reply to this.
      I’ll be back later when you’re not so busy…. 😛

      @desp would love this thread.

      • #113517

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        Bloody hell @illegalsmile55 . Where is your contribution to my post? And get despy back! I would love to meet her!!
        And how come you never respond directly to me, i do not bite you know.

        @illegalsmile55

    • #113515

      Hoping for Nemesis
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      Haha. I am not shitting you. Readings in science mags and journals and a book my female librarian recommended to me!
      She read it herself before mentioning it to me and said Nems this is for you ! You will love it! It was a great read.

      @1purple8

      Come to the brain! Surely you jest!
      Although i am secretly hoping it is true!

      Is that where knocking sone sense into …. CAME from? Haha

  • #113559

    Doc Undy
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    This is my first foray into the forums, as it looks like Nemesis roped me in to give a medical/scientific opinion.

    I have heard of this ‘penis as a pump’ hypothesis previously, among other radical evolutionary ideas of human sexuality. It’s not really a field that I have any expertise in though to give any special informed comment. I will direct you to the Scientific American article in which Professor Gallup of the State University of New York, study was cited.

    https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/bering-in-mind/the-misunderstood-penis/

    For the more technically minded, the original study was published in this journal.

    http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/147470490400200105

    • #113591

      Hoping for Nemesis
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      Thanks for weighing in @doc-undy. Im not a specialist in this field either but the gist would remain the same even if i have made a few errors in comprehension.

      Good to meet you once again.

  • #113561

    Mr Spock
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    Good topic, @hopingfornemesis, its very tongue-in-cheek.

    The other day I saw a bug crawling on the floor in my living room. It had an enormous dick and I got incredibly jealous. So I crushed it under my boot. :-). Always eliminate the competition.

    • #113598

      Hoping for Nemesis
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      That is the way @mrspock! All is fair in love and war!

      Be that Lion- that kills the previous mate’s offspring – when he wins the Lioness from the previous male!

      @mrspock

  • #113565

    Lord Wankdust
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    As far as I am aware… once the jizz-bolt of trapped lightning has been squirted into the welcoming softness of a receptive minge… then the swimmers are set free… and once that first swimmer bangs head-first into the ladies loveeggs-over-easy then that is it. There ain’t no amount of reverse syphoning gonna unpregulate that egg. It really does seem a little like locking the stable door after the horse has bolted, to use your cock to syphon out some other guys love custard when the meal had already been served. I am getting lost in my analogies here….
    I have a fairly proud throbulous bulbous at the end of my shaft (in which – according to Grey’s Anatomy – I am only moderately oversized). I presumed that it was an evolutionary development which meant that women who got shafted by such fine cocks would always want to come back for more. Thus ensuring the DNA continuation of the blessed ones. I appreciate that the lack of a friendly vagina in my life just now seems to be the exception which disproves this “evolutionary explanation” for the “ladies favour the excellent girth” rule, although I think I could probably still claim a for-old-times-sake pity shag, tit=wank or BJ from a couple of old flames (if they are still alive)…

    “The constellations and Comiskey’s lights
    Two old friends in the night
    Who always knew they would if they could
    Meet one last time in the old neighborhood”

    While it has been some time since it has seen active service I can recall a number of occasions over the years where it did seem a very snug fit and would have been capable of operating as a working syphon or stirrup-pump in conjunction with the well-honed and friendly vagina. On one memorable occasion (on a clifftop near Berwick-on-Tweed) the lady’s mimsie was so exquisitely plumbed to the precise specifications of my pork bazooka that her frothing chimney hissed as I thrust in…. and it hissed again as I edged the love piston back a little. If I’d had a length of hose taped on under helmet I could have pumped out the bottom of a medium sized boat or a the sump of a big truck.

  • #113593

    lady-lexis
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    I can’t even think what the sulcus might be! You might need to explain it to me in layman’s terms. How would one go about suctioning sperm out of a vagina with their knob anyway? Does your member have a reverse fuction, Nem?!!

    @hopingfornemesis

    • #113594

      Hoping for Nemesis
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      Haha. Lady!
      The sulcus is the notch behind the cockhead (glans) that is between the cockhaed and the shaft of the cock.the rim of the cockhead is called the coronal sulcus ? From memory because it is like a crown(corona).im working from memory from years ago so could be wrong. If im wrong please docs/ nurses weigh in and correct me.

      So yes, Lady ,apparently your man’s glans evolved this shape to be able to remove another man’s semen before depositing his own!😂😉

      We are talking over many millions of years ago to when we were more biologically like our chimp cousins.
      So chimp females are a lot more promiscuous than women and chimp males are even to this day alot more into rapes and affairs than men.

      They are also super-strong! they reckon an average chimp has the strength and potential rage of three men!remember the chimp that ripped his owner’s face off in usa?

      @lady-lexis

      • #113916

        thedre
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        @hopingfornemesis
        But the Earth has proven to be less than 7000 Years Old my good brother. Dinosaurs, Stars, & Planets are Not was they have taught, and showed-us to be either. Those-Dirty-Rotten-Dog-Lying-Cunty-Cunted-Jew-Bastards,, eh Neme??? Ask Any Curator, Next Time You go to, or even call Any Museum & Anywhere in the World, if they have any Real Prehistoric Bones that you can Touch & See. (Real-Bones), and they will Inform you They’re ALL Plaster Casts of Dinosaurs, Another Proven Fact of about 2 Years Ago Brother.
        https://www.youtubev2.com/watch?v=xDvKD_z3OeQ

  • #113705

    Lord Wankdust
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    @hopingfornemesis

    I have been pondering this theory at work today. I have been picturing a fine manly shaft with a snug fitting and robustly proportioned glans sporting an extravagent coronal sulcus being thrust into a previously jizzed-up clunge… surely the air-tight nature of the initial insertion would only propel the extant jizz further back up into the lady’s egg-tubes and make pregulation by the previous guy’s sperm much more likely?

    Imagine sliding a snugly fitting plunger into a syringe half-full of mayonnaise or salad cream… it is gonna squirt it in the direction of the plunger… ie. Inwards. The Physics of your theory is just plain wrong I think. Though it has been interesting to try and work it out. It fills in the time nicely.

    I had been drawing a few sketches to illustrate this. I was gonna scan them and load them up to photobucket to display on here. But I have inexplicably lost them somewhere between a Maths class I was covering Period 3 and the staff room. It was only a rough schematic with arrows and a few labels. And a drawing of a big cock and a welcoming splinge dripping with baby gravy. It was sketched on the back of a bank statement envelope with my name and address on it. I could be in trouble.

    • #113706

      illegalsmile55
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      Bahahaha!
      Sorry for intruding on your conversation, but I’m dying laughing at the thought of Miss Gyllenhaal finding your sketches.

      @lord-wankdust

      • #113719

        Lord Wankdust
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        @illegalsmile55

        Please feel free to wander in at any point. It is no intrusion. Your comments and inputs are always welcome on my side of the pond.
        As for my sketches and Miss Gyllenhaal… I think they may have ended up in the mobile laptop cabinet. I was ticking off the laptop returns at the end of the period into the ringbinder. I shall go in early tomorrow and try to find and retrieve them.
        But yes. While my pleasant little Miss Gyllenhaal daydream might have drifted away like the last snow flurries of winter, her discovery of my labelled schematic of second-hand semen syphoning from a splinge would stir a chilly toxic element into things. It would be akin to leaving a stinking shit in her lovely handbag. Or suggesting a lunchtime Blumpkin.

      • #113723

        illegalsmile55
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        @lord-wankdust

        You never know, she might be a super freak. I imagine you asking her to stop in and see your etchings. Ask her over for dinner! What’s the worst that can happen?

        A blumpkin sounds thoroughly disgusting, I’d have to pass. I gag changing a diaper. Since you have to breath through the nose while sucking, ugh… *shudders*

        BTW, I agree with you about the splooge only going deeper with a tight fitting throb knob.

    • #113735

      Hoping for Nemesis
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      We are all adults here and everyone can have their say.smarter people than me proposed this theory and i still tend to believe it. Im sure physicists,hydraulic engineers etc would have been consulted . In addition,scienrific articles are peer reviewed and attacked by jealous competitors. Yes,some bullshit articles get through as do academic cheats but generally the policy is stringent.

      Remember evolution is like interest rates and money. How do you get rich? Either a high interest rate over a short period or a tiny interest rate over very longggg period.

      This evolution is over million of years going back to when chimps and humans started to differ. So your male ancestors simply removing one percent of another man’s genetic material gave him and your paternal line, an evolutionary advantage thus allowing you to be born.

      @lord-wankdust

    • #113737

      Hoping for Nemesis
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      Lord, i would love to see your drawings here! I would be more than happy to credit you for your brainchild! Try and find them and put them up.

      And if you do disprove the theory, please credit me in your Nobel -prize accepting speech as your Muse and moral supporter.☺

      @lord-wankdust

      And yes, i know your nit-picking Lit lecturer’s mind has noted i started a sentence with a conjunction.all i will say in my defence is that sometimes i write for effect and proper grammar falls by the way-side.

      • #113795

        Lord Wankdust
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        But it is true to say I often conjunctivise my sentence beginnings – indeed I am noted for it. I am not a Lit Lecturer. It is always better to write for effect than to remain true to some 200 year-old rule which serves no purpose.

        Because it is less than a week until my birthday I shall allow you to call me nit-picking. I am far from that. I always provide massive leeway for my students.

        But that is enough from me now. I am off for to make Stilton and Leek Potato Cakes. With my stunning Paprika’d Beef Casserole full of Parsnips and Carrots… I’ll be guffing like a steam engine tomorrow. Staff meeting should be interesting.

      • #113798

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        Sorry mate. I thought you were Literature lecturer. If you wish please let me know what you are. You did say you were in a dept of a school of higher learning?

        @lord-wankdust

      • #113799

        Lord Wankdust
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        @hopingfornemesis

        Enough questions now. This is task avoidance. Back to work.

      • #113817

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        Ok. Master Wistful. I would not want detention after class.
        @lord-wankdust

  • #113729

    Lord Wankdust
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    @illegalsmile55

    The horror. The horror. Blumpkins. Alabama Hot Pockets, Cleveland Steamers. I rue the day I ever stumbled across the Urban Dictionary. Of course Roger’s Profanisaurus is magnificent.

    As for Miss Gyllenhaal… “Ask her over for dinner. What’s the worst that could happen….?” Where to begin… I think dying in twenty different ways from the soul-crushing humiliation and traditional scottish rejection would be just the start. Once the medical bastards had re-started my heart for the twentieth time I’d have to start looking for another post at a different school. Then I would have to always be on the lookout in case I walked into her in public and had to say an embarrassed “Hello. It’s that old dickhead who tried to ask you out once.

    She is a lovely colleague, I simply over-enjoyed the pleasant chatty attention of an attractive woman a wee while back. It is good that I remembered what I had been missing.

    “I may re-group and try again in a year or two.”

    Edited to add: Jeez. I just remembered I wrote “Lord Wankdust Throbulous Bulbous Schematic Rejection of Syphon Theory” at the top of the diagram. If Gyllenhaal googles “Lord Wankdust” I am toast by Period 1 tomorrow. This is not good.

    • #113732

      illegalsmile55
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      @lord-wankdust

      I too rue the day I learned of the Urban Dictionary. I’ve caught myself in there when I should’ve been making a sandwich. Sigh. Now I’ll have to peruse this new site you mentioned.

      I love to give unsolicited advice, things that I myself don’t have the nuts to do. I think its great that you FELT something stir, and I get it. Boy, do I ever…I got the nerve to ask a guy over for dinner some while back, years actually. I made Portuguese soup and brown bread. When he got here, he was half in the bag. He brought his puppy/dog, who peed on my floor, twice, that I cleaned because he didn’t even realise the dog had done that. I decided to feed him immediately, that’s when I watched in horror as he slurped and spilled his way through the soup. He had it all over him. I had never seen him drinking, holy shit, he was snot slinging drunk. Long story short, last time I invited a guy over for “dinner”.

      I can’t believe you titled your graphic penis schematic. Jeez…. 😀
      I can hardly wait to see what happens…I am engrossed.

  • #113736

    Hoping for Nemesis
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    You had me laughing😂 so you gave up on the basis of one man!
    Comeon illegal. You simply have to finesse your man-choosing strategy. What? There are no hunky outdoor woodsmen in your parts?😅

    Oh.! I agree..the way to a man’s heart is through his ….stomach!!

    @illegalsmile55

    • #113739

      illegalsmile55
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      It’s just easier to not even “go there”. That night got worse, the memory is etched in my psyche. I’ve been permanently scarred. 😀

      @hopingfornemesis

  • #113740

    Hoping for Nemesis
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  • #113741

    Virgin Vomit
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    I came here for the pics. Disappointed.

    • #113743

      Hoping for Nemesis
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      Now you are my kind of woman!😂😉

      Cock pics? Where is seven inch fat cock and ,la psycho?😉
      Also virgin,take a look at the hung guys in the fapping corner of the forum where @illegalsmile55 and @lady-lexis and i are debating whether they are gay or not.

      Im fighting the tide saying they are gay.what do you think?

      And now for another bombshell given i have free rein now to do what i want with the people i want; on average gay men have bigger cocks than straight men!!!

      How ironic is that! Is God playing with us man!!

      @virginvomit

      • #113804

        illegalsmile55
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        @hopingfornemesis

        Whoa! Down boy! Go easy, she just started commenting again! You better be careful nem, she’s smart and witty (attractive too) and you may end up flabbergasted. Good luck buddy. 😉

      • #113816

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        Nah! She has a boyfriend! And anyway she seems brave enough. Look at her comment!😂

        She looks tough and i would not be her type; i get the impression she likes badboys. I am not a badboy unless i have to be. I think iam too clean-cut and wordly for her. She would not like me.😂

        @illegalsmile55

      • #113887

        Virgin Vomit
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        LMAO did you really just decide I’m taken? LIES

      • #113888

        Virgin Vomit
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        Hahaha I love how online you can just assume my personality. How convenient. Yeah actually I do like badboys you’re not wrong, but I like intelligent rage, calculated and precise. Not to say I wouldn’t get off on dumb gladiator warrior shit cause, that’s sexy too. But companion related, the man has to be smarter than I am.

      • #113903

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        Virgin!…if only you could see the smile on my face now.☺

        I wont say i am smarter than you but i am whip-smart!
        I told you i am not a badboy unless i have to be.read my recent posts and you will see i direct my rage precisely to where needed and when needed.otherwise i am a great guy to be around..but as @illegalsmile55 says i do sometimes get confused. I am new to blogging on a personal level see.

        I assumed you were taken as i saw your photos with female friends and their associated comments. Which you still have not confirmed nor denied ,cheeky!

        So i still do not know if you are also into men and if you are still unattached. You also did not get get back to me about hatescrackers and the dick faggot incident. I am over thirty,love but i am still cool!!

        Illegal, i wasnt confused about you was i? I pegged you pretty well.and i say that sincerely as i have always done so.

        Virgin….if you like your men as you have described you are going to LOVE me!

        I do not want to steal you away from illegal but please be my internet buddy as well.

        @virginvomit

      • #113906

        illegalsmile55
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        @hopingfornemesis
        You’re only confusion about me was that whole watching guys beat off thing. 😀 it is difficult to keep track of everyone!

      • #113907

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        Witty my dear..witty! I can hear that whip cracking! Yet i do love you so. You know that right?😉

        I am very loyal and am still worried re @itsplaster who was the first girl that ever talked to me on these sites and cherry 3xo .

        @illegalsmile55

      • #113908

        Virgin Vomit
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        Haha, yes all the buddies! No I never got the dick dm but I’m okay with it. 😀

      • #113909

        Virgin Vomit
        Participant
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        Hell yes we are internet buddies. I keep trying to reply and it takes me to a 404 page.
        The older the better in men. I was calling him a faggot to assert my virtual dominance. Haha

      • #113910

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        Well if he did not send you the dick pic then you have won. You have asserted your virtual dominance.if he was for real he would have sent them to you.you dont think he is some sixteen year old boy do you😂!we have had some guys try to pass themselves off as girls as you know so maybe this is similar? Who knows?

        Well i am older, virgin ,and i have acquired a little wisdom and experience whilst i have been alive .so we should get along just fine.

        Everyone tells me you are witty and good value and i do believe them but i can not see much past a year’s worth of your public- showing history.so i hope to see that fire and wit -at your leisure of course- in future!

        So illegal ,you and i are internet buddies for evermore! May it be so!

        Hey ,any special reason why you called yourself virgin vomit?

        @virginvomit

      • #113911

        Virgin Vomit
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        Pleased to make your alliance. Are you asking if virginvomit has sentimental value or are you trying to ask if I’m indeed a virgin? I guess it’s salacious enough to make you ponder. 🙂

      • #113913

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        No virgin, i was asking about sentimental value. I actually asked illegal the same question about her handle when i met her.

        As for you being a virgin i have sized you up as you have almost certainly done with me. I would never ask a lady that question here and now. However,if you were still a virgin at this stage of your very colourful life i would be very surprised. I say that with all respect.you will learn i dont hate women or think less of them if they have lots of sex (off course i am not saying you have necessarily have had lots of sex !😂) .Im sure illegal would confirm that even if you asked her privately.

        If you read my posts you will see i actually LOVE women and have been called a whiteknight mangina cuck here because of it.

        @virginvomit

      • #114129

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        Comeon virgin,we are meant to be internet buddies! It’s been four days. And why does that vile vixen mean so much to you?
        Ex-girlfriend? Just broke up?

        @virginvomit

      • #113818

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        P.s Just for the record. I do like them smart,witty and hey i do not mind being flabbergasted.

      • #113889

        Virgin Vomit
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        YesYes Illegal you get me. And now we will obviously be internet friends because you complimented me and that’s the best way to win anyone over hahaha. Appeal to their ego! It works. 🙂 I love this place. Any why does everyone always ask me if I’m being sarcastic I’m not. I am drunk tho.

      • #113902

        illegalsmile55
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        Goints: 3,212

        @virginvomit
        I just tell it like it is, you ARE most definitely humorous. I do think you’re attractive, no homo tho, and I’d love to be your internet buddy. 😉

        You’ll have to excuse nemesis, he gets the women on here confused. He’s harmless, and I think he’s a good guy. What do I know?

        Anyways, I’m glad you’re commenting again. Really.

      • #113912

        Virgin Vomit
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        You’re all such gentlemen when you want to be, how sweet. 🙂 I love it.
        Thank you thank you, I’m actually just a little psychopath <3

      • #113915

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        I am a gentleman ALL the time unless it is not called for of course!

        @virginvomit

  • #113790

    Lord Wankdust
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    There is a better sketch on a sheet of A4 but the pictures have come out blurry and I cannot be arsed getting the scanner out just now.

    View post on imgur.com

    Schematic

    • #113797

      Hoping for Nemesis
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      [email protected] you were not in your bath when you drew these….you have missed out on a literal Eureka Moment!

      😂

    • #113805

      illegalsmile55
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      Does the female have hairy armpits?
      I guess you found your schematic easily? Were you able to sleep last night? I thought you may be restless worrying if that pic got into the wrong hands.
      I need to get a life…..I thought about this too much today..lol

      @lord-wankdust

      • #113810

        Lord Wankdust
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        I awoke at 4.30am today and couldn’t get back over to sleep worrying about my sketch. I was in at work an hour before anyone else got there. The cleaners were looking at me like I was lost. The bank statement envelope, letter and a sketched on sheet of A4 were still in the ring-binder log in the laptop mobile bus. In the computer base.

        I dodged a bullet.

        Yes I gave her slightly hairy armpits.

      • #113815

        Hoping for Nemesis
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        Phew!!! Can you imagine you thrown out of school for sonething like that!

      • #113821

        illegalsmile55
        Participant
        Goints: 3,212

        Excellent! You’ll sleep good tonight, in fact, that’s probably happening as I write this. Yay you!! Sweet dreams, and when I say sweet, I mean HOT!

        @lord-wankdust

      • #113875

        Lord Wankdust
        Participant
        Goints: 999

        @illegalsmile55

        Hey that’s a cool thought and thank you for the transatlantic message of goodwill from the hot Lobster State. Hot dream generation would be very excellent but is unlikely I fear. Sometimes a guy cant dream. I ain’t sleeping too well these days. And my dreams are few. I don’t remember any really (though I did have a Gyllenhaal one a few weeks back where I accidentally taught her class… in her dream though… it was weird, it was like I’d just fucking given up attempting to dream my own dreams anymore and was dreaming someone else’s in which I had a cameo appearance as a fool).

        It’s 1.30am and I ain’t sleepy. I read until my eyes dropped about three hours back but I got a bit anxious (rapid palpitations) after I put the light out. I recognise it for what it is and I know it will pass.
        I remember dreaming all the time when I was young. I used to wake up feeling refreshed and with a throbulous bulbous you could hang a wet duffle coat on. I wish I was young again.

        I think I need to spend a few days fishing over the Easter Break. Just a week to go! I’ll take my son out with me… he likes to steer the boat and he caught one more fish than I did last year.

  • #113809

    Sphincterpiston #59535
    Participant
    Goints: 1,457

    My cock looks like an enoki mushroom, which says that I’m better than all of you fukrs…

  • #113904

    Hoping for Nemesis
    Participant
    Goints: 3,332
    VIP – Server Donor

    ADDENDUM!!!!

    I have had many people question me about this theory with most asking about a certain part of it.

    Let me just confirm,my readings emphasize that it is the vacuum created by the glans that helps remove semen not the actual glans physically scooping itself.

    I hope this clears things up a bit.i would like to mention that a dear friend has pointed out that there is confusion here about this matter.

    Also i would like to mention,that the theory does not preclude rape as being the reason why lots of semen has to be sucked out. Another dear friend was mortally offended as i did not point this out sufficiently. My only defence was i was not writing for a name science journal but for a light-hearted forum.

    So to confirm, i am not saying that the only reason for the theory is unfaithfulness . The theory does allow for evolution to have occurred for a woman’s partner to be able to remove some of the rapists semen .This of course allows the woman to have children with the partner SHE chooses.

    I hope this clears it all up.

    Nems

  • #114302

    Lord Wankdust
    Participant
    Goints: 999

    Fake science from the outset. Probably created by a Professor Frink-like mind who has never slid his lamb kebab into a fizzing, steaming she-love crevasse. The throbulous bulbous can only create greater air pressure on the way in. This will force any old semen further in. It cannot do anything else. However if in the act-of-love, the man wiggles his pork ramrod around a little it may (after it has forced the old semen further in) create conditions whereby on the down stroke the increased air pressure might escape, and with some deft beef plunger work he might be able to re-seal the passage and that down stroke could create a mild vaccuum (not actually a vaccuum merely a reduced air pressure). This might be enough to reverse syphon the old jizz back down from her egg-tubes but it will not remove it from her fich-box. It will only froth it up like suds I imagine.
    But this reverse syphon and frothing is only possible after initial entry and that initial forcing of the old spunk back up her jizz collection vent. It is a moving and inspirational topic which did not elude Scotland’s Greatest 20th Century Poet. C M Grieve (AKA “Hugh MacDiarmid”).

    O Wha’s The Bride

    O wha’s the bride that carries the bunch
    O’ thistles blinterin’ white?
    Her cuckold bridegroom little dreids
    What he sall ken this nicht.

    For closer than gudeman can come
    And closer to’r than hersel’,
    Wha didna need her maidenheid
    Has wrocht his purpose fell.

    O wha’s been here afore me, lass,
    And hoo did he get in?
    A man that deed or I was born
    This evil thing has din.

    And left, as it were on a corpse,
    Your maidenheid to me?
    Nae lass, gudeman, sin’ Time began
    ’S hed ony mair to gie.

    But I can gie ye kindness, lad,
    And a pair o’ willin’ hands,
    And you sall hae my breists like stars,
    My limbs like willow wands.

    And on my lips ye’ll heed nae mair,
    And in my hair forget,
    The seed o’ a’ the men that in
    My virgin womb ha’e met.

    Hugh MacDiarmid

    • This reply was modified 3 months, 3 weeks ago by  Lord Wankdust.
    • This reply was modified 3 months, 3 weeks ago by  Lord Wankdust.
  • #115118

    MrKhazar
    Participant
    Goints: 82

    My family is full of fucking adulterers and sex-crazed maniacs 🙁

  • #115121

    Hoping for Nemesis
    Participant
    Goints: 3,332
    VIP – Server Donor

    Fuck it! Give me your sweet cousin’s number… it cant be worse than me marrying in to the Trumps or Clintons.i ‘ll catch less crabs as well!

    @mrkhazar

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