Just kiddin’ Yo! Fucking wiggers…
Question – was anybody else under the impression that homosexuals are these queer people who like unicorns and rainbows and talk all gay and shit?
Luka Magnotta… you gave gay people a bad name. Now fleshy viruses are gonna fear that every fag will have a tendency to stab them in the gut with an ice pick. I see what you did there…
Enough of that. It’s been an absolutely crazy few days and so far, there are no signs it’s gonna slow down by much. Shit hit the fan on the morning of Wednesday, May 30, 2012.
Previous night, just before turning in, I posted a few pictures of people hacked up with a machete and appended a small remark at the end in which I, mostly jokingly, speculated if there could be a connection between Luka Magnotta – a man who was until that day only known as a murderer and a perpetrator in the 1 Lunatic 1 Ice Pick to the Best Gore community and nobody else – and the news of a human foot delivered in a parcel mailed off using Canada Post to the Canadian Conservative Party headquarters in Ottawa.
I shut my computer down, brushed my teeth, wanked warm fluid out of my wang and went to get a good night’s sleep. When I woke up, I could not believe my fucking eyes. Instead of your regular 200 new members who join Best Gore on a typical night, now there were 3,000. Instead of your typical few dozen emails from members I get over your typical night, I had hundreds – most coming from big media names. And to all that, I could barely load my fucking site it was under so much load.
Fellow Best Gore member with whom I exchange emails every now and then sent me a message that Luka Magnotta, days after having been identified by the Best Gore community, has been officially named by the Canadian police a suspect in the case of severed human remains in the mail to the Canadian political parties and a human torso discovered in a suitcase in Montreal. I was like – you have got to be fucking kidding me? I mean, when I mentioned it in an unrelated post with machete murders, I wasn’t actually serious. It was naught but a bland spew out of a mind of a tired man who’s really ready to get some effin sleep after a long day.
But the flood of emails with requests for interviews left little doubt that it’s actually happening. So there I was, stuck with hundreds of emails from reporters asking to do an interview with me and a server so overloaded, you could barely load up a page. Where do you go from there?
Let me just tell you this – from the moment I woke up on Wednesday morning, until way late into the night on Thursday, I did nothing but respond to emails. I went nonstop through who day Wednesday, then all throughout the night, and then on through whole of Thursday and through whole following night until sun started rising again just before 5am – at that point I could no longer keep my eyes open, and on the bed I collapsed.
Obviously, being overwhelmed with emails was one thing, but what bugged me the most was that people could not access my site owing to the extremely heavy traffic load server was under. As a webmaster. When your website is not accessible to public, that is the worst thing that can happen to you. When your website is not out there, you have nothing.
So there I was, extremely stressed out by the fact that I can’t keep the site on line, and to it all I have all those reporters pushing me to do an interview with them and needing it now because it was a very time sensitive topic. Needless to say, I had to turn any and all requests for phone interviews or meet ups with camera crews down. It was plain and simple impossible to accommodate that. The best I could do was to request everyone to ask their questions by email and I would answer them to the best of my knowledge in order in which they were received. That is precisely what I did for almost 48 hours straight.
Luckily, I had a yoghurt in the fridge and a chocolate bar in the bag. Had I not, I would not have eaten those two days.
When madness started on Wednesday, I thought it could not possibly get worse. May was gonna be a bit of a milestone for Best Gore because for the first time, the website was to have been read by more than 3 Million people a month. On May 30, two days before the end of the month, extra 200,000 unique visits were added to the milestone (on top of anticipated traffic). Hoping things would slow down a bit the following day, I saw traffic on Thursday May 31, 2012 grow compared to the day before by almost 300%. More than half a million people, on top of our regular 100,000 daily users got on Best Gore that day.
Luckily, unlike on Wednesday, I had my man slicer around who helped to optimize the server, the database and some other things so despite an even higher load than the day before, server was less down and served more pages on Thursday than on Wednesday.
And now here we are on the first day of June, 2012. So far, the traffic has been at the same level as yesterday – I anticipate the server to have served well over half a million unique IP addresses today again. But – to my benefit – I only got a few requests for interviews today.
And here’s a thing – I do not own a cell phone (or any other phone for that matter). I am not aware of any Canadian law which would make phone ownership mandatory so I do not own one. I do not wish to be disturbed by people who wish to talk. For the most part, I really have nothing to talk about with fleshy viruses plus I find that most conversations reach boring or downright annoying points soon after they started.
So… regardless of how pushy some of the reporters got, I could not accommodate their requests for over the phone interviews and because of how many emails I was getting, could not possibly withdraw myself to pose before the cameras. Plus I’m not much of a camera whore and do not seek attention of the public (the more fleshy viruses leave me alone, the happier I am).
This fact – the fact that I was more than willing to answer anyone’s questions, but strictly only over the email, proved to be a very good strategy later on. Soon after some reports were published, people started asking me why I said this or that? And I’m like – what? You have got to be fucking kidding me! I’ve never said nor implied anything even remotely similar to that.
But luckily, because all conversations were restricted to emails (did two using Skype, but only typing), I have written proof of what I said so they can’t frame me by spreading rumors and claiming I may have mentioned it over the phone. Divine intervention, I’m telling you.
Speaking of which – I spent 9 months preparing for my big withdrawal into the wilderness, had my mind and body set for it and when I was ready to go, I was delivered blows which forced me to return to start working on an alternative strategy. Was that a divine intervention too? Did higher power know I will be needed here so I can post the 1 Lunatic 1 Ice Pick video and have the Best Gore community pin that Luka character down?
By now you probably already know that Luka Magnolla left Canada by plane on May 26 for France. He’s now on Interpol’s wanted list and hunted the world over, not just here in Canada. The victim has also been identified – 33 year old Lin Jun from Wuhan, the most populous city in central China was an exchange student studying at Montreal’s Concordia University. Luka and Lin Jun used to exchange bodily fluids via the rectal entrance point and tongue massaged each others prostates before the murder, dismemberment, decapitation, necrophilia and cannibalism took place.
I once again apologize for slow loading site, frequent downtimes and whatever other unusual behavior you may be experiencing. I wish I could tell you it will get back to normal soon, but by the way things seem at this point, it’s gonna be at least a few more days. Nobody’s more dedicated to finding a solution to it asap than I am – trust me – and I’m working around the clock to get us back to speed, but I’m faced with challenges that make it rather tough. I’m on it though. Please bear with me and stay true! We’re Best Gore – Here Today, Gore Tomorrow.
By the way, over the past 3 days, at least 18,000 new people registered on Best Gore. That’s a whole lotta newbies. We need to find a way to welcome them to Best Gore somehow. I almost feel shy to make new posts (not like I could load any page, let alone make a post) cause it’s like speaking to a brand new audience for the first time.
As always, you guys kick ass! You’re the best in the world and have my utmost respect.
BTW – I was just kidding with the title. I’m too overworked to think properly. I just thought I’d give you an update and could not think of a decent title so I went the the stupidest one I could pull out of my ass.