Man Falls Off a Cliff, Shits Himself on Landing

Man Falls Off a Cliff, Shits Himself on Landing

I wonder if that’s another one of those foreigners committing “suicide” in Thailand. I don’t have any info on where the incident took place, but it looks all too familiar.

Unless this was a suicide by going to Thailand, than this man went skinny dipping, slipped and fell off a cliff, landing on large bounders. The landing opened up his gaping asshole and exposed some of the waste that was just about ready to be shat out. He was probably gonna poop it out as soon as he had landed in the sea. Nobody would notice a little human shit floating with the sea weed. Especially not if this happened in Thailand where thousands of hookers and scammers piss and shit into the sea every night as they line up along the beaches in search of an unwary foreigner to take advantage of.

Author: Vincit Omnia Veritas

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83 thoughts on “Man Falls Off a Cliff, Shits Himself on Landing”

  1. It’s always a good idea to empty the shit tank before you put your body through enough strain your rectum loses the ability to keep it all in. But he’s dead so I guess it doesn’t really even matter if he missed his final shit

    1. When I was a kid my mom would always make me go to the bathroom before going out wether I had to or not.
      I can think of a few really fucked up circumstances where suddenly having to take a shit could really fuck you up. One being just as your date decides to blow you.
      Anyone else have any?

      1. That happened to me once but with vomit, I had a little too much to drink and ended up having to quickly slip out under darkness to the toilet, chucked up, rinsed the mouth out and hey presto back in there, I am a ninja.

        1. @om, that’s not too bad…I’ve puked on chicks I was fucking. The worst is when you’re fucking a chick for the first time and out of nowhere you cut the cheese…the second it happens you know you’d better blow your load quick cuz it takes a bit for her to realize it.

          1. Another bad circumstance for a S.S.O.S. (sudden shit onset situation) would be just as your name is called for you to go up and get your diploma at the graduation ceremony.

          2. BB, I’d say cutting the cheese while fucking isn’t as bad as cutting the cheese while a fine ass dude is in the middle of some really good pussy eating! Yup, True story! I was fighting the big explosion and kinda squeezing these muscles- AND IT HAPPENED! With his face right there, there was simply NO denying it! Fucked up situation all the way around! Not only did i bust up laughing, but i lost my fucking O! I don’t like to think of it as a fart- i only “panty whisper”, but that time there were no panties. Lol.

            A fucked up scenariofor the S.S.O.S is knowingyou have JUST enough gas to get your ass home, and then someone has to get in a fucking accident, shutting down the only 2 fucking lanes that exist, you got cars bumper to bumper, you’re in the middle of nowhere, there’s no bathroom, no gas station and you don’t have toilet paper either! Do you shit yourself or leave your already parked car and sit on the center divide?! What would you do?!Nowthat’s a fucked up S.S.O.S! You know you’d end up online from every fucking angle since everyone would be laughingand recording! Fuck me.. Nit dating that ever actually happened to me, but maybe it did.. Lol

          3. @[email protected] hells to the no the most embarrassing gas was when I would run at school try jogging and squeezing your ass cheecks together for about an hour my excuse was faking a leg cramp right when I feel the cheese sliding out and I’m not talking about the silent farts more of the loud wet ones. DX goddamn I remember high school. Don’t get me started on the stairs or sit-ups >.>

          4. @JuicyJ, what would I do in that situationyou ask…I’d hobble my ass up to the fuckhead who caused the mess in the first place and shit on the hood of his fucking car.

          1. Lol, good luck misfit, if there’s someone’s brains splattered all over the road and traffic is at a stand still. Bay area (San Francisco bay area) freeways, SUCK ASS!! =/ You better prepare to make that S.S.O.S a spectator event!! 😉

          2. One of my most embarassing moments was when I was just getting ready to leave my In-laws house and in an instant I started feeling sick so I decided to leave and hurry home before it got any worse. So here I am driving along and getting sicker and sicker with every mile, then I couldn’t hold it any longer and I was violently vomiting so hard all down the front of myself because I had nothing with me to throw-up in and the force of throwing up made me shit my pants and not just any pants but spandex capris and if that wasn’t enough,I had my son in the car with me (he was about 4yrs. old at the time).And all I had eaten that day was a bunch of strawberries, so when I started throwing up, it was nothing but red so my son started to cry and panic because he thought it was blood. Needless to say that was the longest 10 miles of my life.

          3. @JuicyJ xD I live in California I know how fucked up and shitty the freeway is try going to LA, the freeway down there is always in construction and if your lucky you might end up seeing a head of collision. @sagemoon holy shit O.O did everyone in the car with you start vomiting after they saw you ..? goddamn that’s crazy as fuck x.x

          4. @misfit, where about in Cali are you from?? When i took my kids to Disneyland we got stuck in LA afternoon traffic and fuck me! Nothing quite like being straight bumper 2bumper AND still moving at 70mph! @Sagemoon, that’s horrible!!I have a 4 year old Son and he would probably just me 457 questions if i were spewing! Lol. My10 year old and 8 year old girls would probably try to film me and the other would take stills! FML

          5. I know right where that is Misfit!! That’s one of them places that you pass by on road-trips! Lol. Lots of meth labs in Fresno. My friend is from there. That’s another S.S.O.S! You’re walking down the street and boom! A fucking meth house blows! Lol. You’re about 3.5 hours away from me in the East Bay. Ps- how do you know when someone replies on here? Do you guys get emails or something? I just have to remember which shit i commented on and keep checking it! =/

          6. @JuicyJ xD I have to keep reminding myself to go back to the posts I’ve commented on I’m not really sure if you get alerts if one replies to you it would be awesome if that happened but whatever’s. I do the same thing too I keep comming back to the old posts to check if anyone else replied /:

    1. For some reason that always happens while shopping at Walmart where they stock their bathrooms with that fucking cheap one ply toilet paper that you have to fold over about 20 fucking times so your fingers don’t end up covered in shit.

      1. Or if your even lucky enough to have toilet paper in a public bathroom. I can’t count the number of times I wiped my ass with those brown paper towels, or the free wax-paper cowboy hats they hang above the toilets.

          1. BB, i know becauseyou’re a dude and all, that fucking is usually the only thing you guys think about, but you seem like one cool ass dude! Like i could genuinely have fun with you! I like to be the whole girly girl when i need to, but i love to have fun and laugh my ass of too! =)

          2. @JuicyJ, thanks for the compliment. I like to tell things the way they are as I see them and I don’t put much thought into my replies, I usually say the first thing that pops into my head and if it comes across funny that’s just my personality. You seem like a cool chick too.

          3. I’m pretty sure while hiking I have done the same Broke, but generally stick to moss or leaves. 🙂 bark is a bit rough on those soft places down there.

        1. @Broke ..I read your 2 fine poems and with that you have all bases covered! Remember..you’re not only representing yourself, your also representing Boeing 747s and all things titanium !
          @ Empty…thats also quite the fine poem.

    1. It seems pretty obvious that he was cliff diving in the raw. Unfortunately for him the rocks he was jumping from were covered in slime causing him to slip and fall. Unfortunate for him but fortunate for us.

  2. Storytime bitches!!
    So last season I was at the mountain. We were riding through the park. I needed to shit. But that can always wait till later. I jumped onto one of the rails, hung up on it and fell. Previously mentioned shit became excreted. Fuck.

  3. Something very weird was going right before he died and I would love to know what it was. Probably involved (fill in the blank) and at least two or three (fill in the blank) while standing on a slippery rock.

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